Kids say the darndest things, don’t they? My very well-spoken two year old has had some doozies, but the worst thing he’s said to date has to be Dump Truck.
Not long ago we were out shopping as a family at a local Winners. G-man was in the cart and we were perusing shoes down an aisle when a woman turns the corner towards us pushing a stroller containing a cute little boy (also a toddler), holding a MASSIVE toy Dump Truck.
There was nothing special about the woman or child, or the Dump Truck for that matter, and I didn’t even notice them really until G-Man got very, very excited and at the top of his little lungs screamed
The woman looked at me, and at G-Man and back to me.
Then G-Man screams: “MUMMY! Look a Dump Truck!” And at this point in the story I suppose I should explain that when G-Man says Dump Truck is doesn’t sound like Dump Truck at all. So what ALL the other poor store patrons heard was actually…
“Mummy! Look a DUMB FUCK!”
My face must have been scarlet. I immediately said: “I’m so sorry- he’s saying Dump Truck- he’s not swearing at you,” she smiled (thank fuck) and laughed and nodded her head. She understood – after all she was pushing a toddler around too.
You can ask our friends, and family; when G-man says Dump Truck you would think in reality we taught him to say Dumb Fuck. He says it with perfect profane clarity. To the point where now, we are coaching him to say “truck” like “Tee-ruck” because shit is getting out of hand, and because there’s a lot of different kinds of trucks out there…just imagine these in the right (or wrong) context: Fire Truck, Big Truck, Slow Truck, Red Truck, Daddy’s Truck…the list goes on and it doesn’t get any less funny because let’s face it- somehow G-man also always manages to have perfect timing when he’s calling out a Truck.
Someday ask me to tell you about the Cow Clock we got Grampa for Father’s Day this year- that was a pretty good one too!
xo Guest Blogger Steph