Shit they don't tell you: Pregnancy

10 random things pregnant women think about

1 – Sweat: Why am I so sweaty? Seriously, I’m standing still and my armpits are soaking wet. No effort is being exerted. Yet the sweat persists.

2 – Skin: What is up with my complexion? Why is my face all red and splotchy? And why all the sudden breakouts? My skin looks mad. Cover up is a must.

3 – Cellulite: I have accepted the cellulite on the back of my thighs. Why, now, is there cellulite on the FRONT? Why?? And will it ever go away?

4 – Hair: You’ll look in the mirror and proclaim, “Damn, girl. Your hair looks fabulous – so thick, lustrous, and shiny.” Enjoy this thick hair moment, before it starts falling out after baby comes. Sad, but true.

5 – Body hair: I could have sworn I just tweezed my eyebrows yesterday. And didn’t I just shave this morning? Time to pluck / shave again?! Yes, yes it is. Keep those tweezers and razors close by.

6 – Mood: One minute I’m fine, and the very next, watch out! Things can escalate from 0 to 60 in the blink of an eye. Sometimes, there is absolutely no reason for this shift in mood. I blame hormones. It’s gotta be.

7 – Cravings: Gimmie all the carbs. Never mind the strange flavour combinations. I want bread, rice, and more bread. Toast with peanut butter, specifically. French fries, too.

8 – Bodily fluids: Panty liners. That is all.

9 – Nipples: What is happening here? The day your nipples change can be a frightening one. Think darker and bigger. Good luck eating chocolate macaroons again.

10 – Hormones: Why do I smell like an onion? Is it because of the hormones? Can anyone else smell me? I blame it all on hormones.

xo Leigh